Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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