Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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