She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
