Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I FOUND THE LEGS
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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