I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
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