i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
