Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Randomize
