belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize