So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
