i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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