It's like a parade of train wrecks.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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