at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
