PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
