my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize