Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
