found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
