bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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