she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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