I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
