Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
