Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Randomize
