hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize