Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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