Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Randomize
