Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
