There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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