Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
