in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize