He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
