so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
