I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
