Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
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