Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
