u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
