I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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