I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
he was CRYING into my vagina
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
