Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
