cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Randomize
