Just fell off a train. Bad.
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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