Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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