No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Shame is for Republicans.
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