As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Randomize
