She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
