You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize
