it was like his penis was on wheels.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
