This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
