VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
