And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
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