And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Everclear isn't food dammit
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
