Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize