I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize