Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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